A couple of hours after I sent out the last update (two evenings ago), Robbie had a very, very hard evening. He was experiencing itching on every part of his body - he said it itches so bad it hurts and was constantly just writhing in the bed. He also became flushed with red splotches all over and his face was bright red. He was panting like a dog who had finished a long run. In the midst of his severe agitation he asked for us to anoint him and pray for him. He again wrote out, “A-M I G-O-I-N-G T-O D-I-E-?” And Tanja and I again responded with all the assurances we could give him, saying things like “No, no, you are getting better, this is probably a withdrawal from your meds or the brain reconnecting with some nerves but it is part of you getting better.” ...and so on. It was when I said, “You don’t need to be afraid” that he started getting upset even more than he was and began spelling on the board very passionately, almost hitting the board with each letter for emphasis:
“I A-M N-O-T A-F-R-A-I-D”
Understand, the pain that he was in made it extremely difficult for him to stop writhing long enough to spell an entire sentence out but he forced himself to continue spelling:
“I K-N-O-W I’-M G-O-I-N-G T-O H-E-A-V-E-N W-I-T-H G-O-D.”
He then spelled:
“D-O Y-O-U K-N-O-W-?”
Yes, we do know and what a blessing to know we will have every tear wiped away. He was somewhat belatedly given some meds to help with it but started getting better shortly before those meds took effect. We have a wonderful Doctor and she left her home to return to the hospital to check on Robbie. He was already much better when she got there, but we of course shared our thankfulness to Dr. Stefans. After she walked out, Robbie was very adamantly spelling,
“G-O-D M-A-D-E M-E B-E-T-T-E-R, N-O-T T-H-E D-R. A-N-D N-O-T T-H-E M-E-D-S.”
The rest of the evening, every time we commented on our relief that he was better, he would spell again and again:
“G-O-D N-O-T M-E-D-S” :-)
He just has a deep desire for people to know it is God who is making him better. Sometimes, we wish all these prayers going up for Robbie would result in a show of God’s healing power and that there would be a dramatic and obviously miraculous healing. In our limited thinking, we say, “What a powerful testimony to those working with him and those praying for him. Surely, God, you want that.”
I do believe God has healed Robbie but, more importantly, I see clearly that He is building a faith in Robbie that will result in a much more powerful long term result in the Kingdom of God than any shortcut healing would. That being said, I STILL ask that you pray that Robbie be brought to full recovery RIGHT NOW in the name of Jesus and for His glory alone.
Robbie had a decent day physically yesterday but a hard day emotionally. He has moments of just being plain “M-A-D” at having to be in a bed, be in the hospital...the list goes on. Those moments filled a lot of the day yesterday as he just didn’t feel like doing the few things he is able to do now, like get in a wheel chair and go downstairs for a little while before he hurts from being in the wheel chair too much.
PLEASE PRAY THAT HE FEELS GOOD ENOUGH TO GET OUT OF HIS ROOM SOME AND PRAY THAT HE WON’T SUFFER WITHDRAWALS FROM THESE MEDICATIONS.
And be sure to join us in thanking God for every bit of improvement that we continue to see in our son. Though the improvements are small, His love is BIG.
Grace and peace, Ken
P.S. Many of you have commented about his “spell board”. I thought you might be interested in seeing the new and improved version I just made for him (attached).